There are a lot of reasons as to why we chose to homeschool. However rather than peel off an exhausting list, of faith filled, education reaching, social optimising reasons for our individual children, I’m sharing one vastly overarching incentive that massively contributed to our life changing decision. In a nut shell, we wanted to allow our children to remain children. Our 12 year old was navigating high school and its challenges, and there were many. We were on the edge. I would bring them out for ‘nature therapy’ after their school day – bringing them into the wild – into a world of sticks and stones, anything to release the tension and allow the school day to be miles away, to shed the lessons he was learning from his peers about himself. I realised he had around three years left before he was in the exam system, or sidestep to college, or take up an apprenticeship – three years left of childhood. How was he to spend it? What were his influences to be. And who would his mentors be? What our children give up of themselves to fit ‘cool’ – so we chose a different circle for him to navigate – homeschool.
There were many reasons for this decision. Do we want to discuss the pressure that social media is pressing upon our youth? Or perhaps the test driven (administration headed) curriculum of ‘excellence’? Or the unlimited internet and screen time that shapes and fashions our children today? You know, for a laugh? Probably not. Let’s not go there.
Perhaps we can move into entitlement territory. Well that doesn’t sound much better, but it is. It is a picture of relief. The laying to rest of the educational pedestal that children are placed upon in school.
I believe that the pressure that is put upon our children to perform well can really be much better removed. And it is a performance, the school dynamic. A professional performance. Children can learn to adapt vast or even limited knowledge into a format that results in a ‘good’ performance. They learn to mould to the strongest characters of the class, remember them? And they learn that teachers are always looking at the pupils for their best performance, that put them on top, that they are safely on the bus first, and that their achievements are of paramount importance – it is all about them. Stop! Stop! – I hear you say – it is in fact about them, and isn’t that good? – their success is of primary importance, so they can do well and learn well and get good jobs – whatever they’re doing, it’s all about them.
The truth is that only minority of the pupils are of such an temperament to comply and thrive in the game – the performance- or keep up with the social heights of the class. What happens to the rest? Well many of them get on fine, surfing the waves of influence with mixed results, let’s say, that loaded term.. And then there’re those that don’t fit the mould. They don’t comply with the classroom environment, or they don’t fit in with the mob. They can’t learn, and they can’t thrive.
Schools are becoming increasingly aware of this, and a lot is in place to help some of these children.
However we chose to school at home, – school is not the only circle. And what they learn by letting the elderly person on the bus first; and by contributing to the preparing, enjoying, and washing up of their lunch (rather than by ‘ordering’ it). I think is relieving for them that it’s really not all about them. They are part of a much bigger picture.
It’s a picture very different from this race to end. It’s a picture of the love of learning, and a picture of stopping and playing. It’s a picture of intergenerational relationships that is equally balanced – reciprocal helping of one another. It’s a picture of honest work, and honest down time. What a load and pressure off – one child’s success are not the ultimate end point of everyone around them in the school day. And breathe.
For children to be children, and for them to love to learn. For children to have censored screen time (a necessity of this day), and to learn how to play with one another. The hold and aspiration for ‘cool’ and what that costs loosened. For children to light fires, spot wildlife, and run their socks off before settling indoors with their books. This is worth the weight. Oh yes, it’s a weight. But we’re learning too, the balance of work and play. Homeschool is contagious – it’s not just about them.
Good luck! I miss it!